The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor Review – Another One Bit the Dance-Pad

Can human beings accomplish absolutely everything? From early childhood, we are told that we can. The indomitability of the human spirit is what drives mankind forward in spite of the odds. But what happens when we can’t do something? When we are facing an adversary so powerful, that we already know we won’t emerge victorious. What happens then?

The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor Review

What does all of that have to do with The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor? Simple…I know I can’t dance, and was in desperate need of assistance in completing this game as a result. Unfortunately, for me, no one heeded my calls. And what did I do then? I tried to keep up as much as I could with the game’s rhythm, and by doing so, I realized that The Metronomicon is a game with a strong premise – just not strong enough for those uninitiated in rhythm games.

The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor is essentially the console version’s expansion pack on the 2016 original release. The game now features multiplayer, a new playable mode, a new character, new power-ups, different sidequests, and new “tweaks.” These tweaks in question are meant to be balanced, mind you. Does the game feature an easy mode? Yes, it does.

I want to clarify something right here and now: I never played the original Metronomicon game – however, I can safely attest that it’s quite different from the typical rhythm games we have come to expect. This game has sword-and-sorcery RPG elements, a fun story, good voice-acting (which is very unusual, especially coming from an indie title like this), a fantastic soundtrack – which is a healthy mixture of electronic, pop, techno-pop, etc. – and quirky aesthetics.

And if that wasn’t enough, the gameplay is actually quite deeper than it appears. Your characters are given primary abilities that you can switch back and forth depending on how you want to use them. The characters are also given secondary abilities that trigger automatically depending on how well you’re dancing through a song. There’s also elemental attacks, and different equipment you can use on your characters, and status effects; which can either assist or hamper your dance moves. All in all, it sounds like The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor is the definitive music/rhythm game to put an end to the search for that elusive, ultimate music/rhythm game.

Alas, I am saddened to announce that the never-ending search must continue…at least for me. The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor is not the best game in the industry to deliver the dance moves I want, even if it delivers the ones I need. And that’s partially attributed to a solid presentation. Here lies the biggest issue with this game: it’s very overwhelming. Aside from the fact that you have to face a horde of enemies through every beat and move on each particular track, you also have to keep an eye out for all the other things influencing your gameplay: the health bar, the status effect, the abilities you’re using, your equipment, and so on and so forth. You must do this all-the-while you deal with the dance move you’re supposed to perform.

This leads me to my next gripe: this is not an easy game by any means. If you don’t have fast fingers and reflexes, forget it… You will not find The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor fun by any stretch of the imagination.

I remember when I was younger, I used to play StepMania on my friend’s computer. We’d download track packages that included several anime-related songs like anime opening and ending sequences. The difficulty therein was determined by how fast the track was, and of course, who programmed the track to begin with. Now, I could toggle with the difficulty setting in that game like I can in The Metronomicon. That being said, the similarity and difference is that I was only concerned about one thing, and one thing alone as I played both games: to nail the next dance move correctly. That aspect alone made StepMania fun and enticing, even if I didn’t know how to dance (and I still don’t to this day).

The Metronomicon: Slay the Dance Floor is still a fun game despite its issues. I just wish there was a way tighten its focus. Perhaps a dance pad would help make The Metronomicon zero-in more on the whole as opposed to the sum of its parts? I don’t know. What do you think?